For quite a while now, I've had the idea to discuss some of the albums that have had the greatest impacts on me. Now this isn't to say that the albums have necessarily held up over the years, although I still own most, if not all of them. I'm also not trying to argue that these are the best releases from each artist/band. No, I'm simply creating a list of albums that marked specific points in my life. Some of these albums were first heard or purchased on or near specific occurrences while others simply made me feel funny in my pants (I'll explain, don't worry.). I've broken out several of these discs out over the last few weeks and I can honestly say that I remember how I felt upon first (100+) listen(s). They will never be purged.
So, without further ado...I present to you...Def Leppard-"Hysteria."
If there is one thing that I know for certain, it is this: I started to notice girls mere minutes into my first listen of Def Leppard's album "Hysteria." It certainly didn't hurt that the album's opener was titled "Women," but that track was just the beginning. I swear that my voice dropped and I sprouted a shitty mustache over the next hour and several minutes. And this was before I saw any of the videos.
The album in question came out in 1987, but other than a few seconds here and there on the radio, I really didn't hear it until my sister brought a dubbed copy of it home from college one Friday night in the fall of 1988. And for this, I will forever be grateful to her.
As previously mentioned, it was a Friday night in the fall of 1988. I was in fifth grade. In 1988, it was the fashion for fifth graders to do absolutely nothing on Friday nights except perhaps sleep over at a friend's house, maybe catch some "Family Matters," etc, etc. My sis got home from a long week of classes at Shippensburg University sometime around 6, if my memory serves me correctly. After dinner, she began unpacking her laundry from the week and handed me a cassette with Def Leppard scribbled on the side. I was vaguely familiar with them. They had the one-armed drummer, right? I had heard a few seconds of "Pour Some Sugar On Me" and it seemed pretty cool. So, it sauntered over to my Panasonic boombox and tossed in the cassette. I can't remember for sure, but I don't think I spoke until the following Tuesday. The album was HUGE; unlike anything I had ever heard before. The guitars were bigger than life. Rick Allen's beats were thunderous (especially considering that he had/has 50% fewer arms than most people) and "Mutt" Lange's production was top-notch. There was absolutely nothing about this record that I didn't LOVE. The vocal harmonies were spot on, the lyrics were juuuust clear enough without being toooo clear. And even at the tender age of 11, I knew there was quite a bit of innuendo in these songs. I was blown away. This was music created by guys who constantly got laid for guys who constantly wanted to get laid. I suddenly wanted a Camaro. The urge to rip all the sleeves off of all my t-shirts was almost overwhelming. I wanted a one of those awful hands-free microphones that the bass-player wore in all the videos that depicted them playing live. Looking back, it's amazing I didn't accidentally become a father sometime in the summer of 1989 (Good thing my love affair with Tom Petty's "Full Moon Fever" happened when it did, but that's another story.).
In the coming weeks, I made numerous copies of this album for friends. Even at the tender age of 11, I recognized the value hidden away in miles and miles (feet and feet) of magnetic tape stored in this Memorex brand coffin. Sometime during this period, I began catching the videos that coincided with the release of the singles. "Armageddon It," "Pour Some Sugar On Me," "Rocket," "Love Bites" and "Hysteria" all seemed to be released mere minutes apart. The last two were kind of ballady, mid-tempo numbers that gave the band members an opportunity to catch their collective breaths between banging chicks and drinking beer. They were fine. But the first three were absolute barn-burners. These are the ones responsible for whisking me through puberty.
"Armageddon It" and "Pour Some Sugar On Me" were basically the same video: Live footage of the band playing the songs. Same concert. Same clothes (or lack thereof). Same hot groupies. These two songs, possibly the biggest, most popular singles on the entire record, were super-heavy to me in 1988. So heavy, in fact, that my friend Trevor and I would put the tape on a boombox in his garage and dunk on his (lowered to about 7 feet) basketball hoop for hours upon hours. We agreed that the album was full of psyche-songs (songs used to psyche oneself up) but agreed even more that those two tracks in particular were the epitome (although we didn't know that word) of awesome. So, the videos were pretty great, albeit normal. Nothing too crazy, but it was nice to be able to put faces to the sounds, if that makes sense. One thing that was drilled into my head as a result of these videos was that at least 75% of all rockers were allergic to shirts. They just couldn't wear them. I can only guess that they somehow hindered their abilities to obtain and subsequently maintain erections, but I can't be certain. The only consistent exception was the drummer who always seemed to wear t-shirts with his own face air-brushed on them. I can completely understand why a dude with one arm would not want to go shirtless, but c'mon...who wants to sleep with a guy who 1) sports an air-brushed shirt and 2) has his own face upon said shirt? OK, OK. EVERYONE, that's who. It didn't matter. They could have done anything and I would have thought it was incredible. The video for "Rocket" was badass as well. Tons of TVs showing tons of clips of England's premier glam and punk bands. It was so serious. Everything seemed to flash too quickly for my little fifth-grade mind to comprehend, but I loved it.
As I got older, I realized that what seemed to be so sexy and dangerous about this band, or rock in general, could easily be seen as homoerotic. Sure, 33 year-old me sees that, but 11 year-old me was sucked in and happy, for that matter. Was this Def Leppard's greatest album? Commercially, yes. But realistically? No. Did it, however, allow for the dropping of my voice a year or so early? Yes. Did it possibly act as a gateway album for other things heavy/sexy/dangerous? Possibly. Did I listen to it at work yesterday and still love every note of it? Absolutely.
Does It Still Hold Up?: Yes.
Is It Their Best Album?: No.
If No, What Is?: "Pyromania."
Do I Still Own A Copy Of This Album?: Yes. CD and LP.
